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- About -

JENNA IN 600 WORDS

Do not let the shadows of your past darken the doorstep of your future.

At one point in my life, I would have been scared to write on this page. I would not have wanted to reveal who I am and what I have gone through. The shame, the sense of failure, the insecurities, the mistakes, and the absolute cluelessness over my own identity crippled me from letting myself be seen. It was safer to hide. It was safer to stay silent. It was safer to shrink myself away than risk being noticed. It was safer to stay trapped in a life that made it impossible to live out my purpose, that hindered me from stepping into my authentic self, that closed myself off to letting the world know my name.

I created my identity off of my struggles, my fears, labels given to me by others, unkind words spoken to me, my thinking. All those things produced for me a name for myself; Disordered Jenna, claiming it and embodying it since the age of 8. It was Jenna with depression, anxiety, OCD, bipolar, and self harm. It was Jenna with anorexia that nearly cost me everything. All that I did, every choice I made, every moment I experienced centered around what aligned with Disordered Jenna. I was scared to be anything but that girl. To be honest, I did not remember anything but her. She was known and familiar and comforting. She was home to me. But she was not who I was designed to be. She was not who my heart longed to see in the mirror. She was not who my soul wrote in the future chapters of my book of life.

Underneath all the fear of letting that identity go was the pure excitement of getting to uncover and meet Authentic Jenna. There was this great anticipation to watch what living as her would mean for my future. There was ecitement to be her and show her to this world. I know the pain of losing who you are, but I also know the bliss of rediscovering that person. Second by second I stepped forward in a quest to bring Authentic Jenna to the light.

Because of that, today when you ask me who I am, I will tell you this; I am a life coach, a dream fulfiller, a lover of life, a joy enthusiast,  a person of perpetual hope, a warrior, in a constant state of wanderlust. I am a writer, an authenticity activist, a continual work in progress, an ever evolving soul moving closer each day to my purpose. I am not my past nor am I yet my future but the woman of this very second living to the fullest. I am my heart designed to love without borders, to accept unconditionally, and to feel without limits. I am what I choose to become from what I have overcome.

Fear and faith cannot exist simultaneously. You have to decide which one you will live out.

The DECISION to be authentically you is the place where miracles unfold and your purpose is revealed. The challenge is looking in the mirror long enough to see past our insecurities, defy the labels we have been given, silence our inner critic, and light the true spark of our soul. It is about igniting the flame buried deep, quietly waiting to be brought back to life once our minds align with our hearts. You are a perfectly imperfect being. Regardless of any shame, guilt or resentment hidden within you, your purpose and soul remain untouched, untainted and simply waiting your decision to be yourself to the most authentic form. Life is about living, not just existing and there is so much to live unto in this world.

J.L.